I'm hoping there is a better way. Even with the promised $40 off the price of registration and the accompanying $50 credit on merchandise offered by exhibitors, it somehow doesn't seem enough to get me to register for anything called "The Orange Conference." As anyone who knows me very well at all can tell you, I'm not much of an "orange" kind of guy. My entire congregation wore orange to worship on my 50th birthday just to harass me. Orange just isn't on my palette.
Don't get me wrong, the fruit is fine -- even the pumpkin. And I can endure it. After all, the school colors of my junior high alma mater were orange and white, and the colors of my wife's educational employer are orange and black. It doesn't send me into a rage or fling me over the toilet to puke. I just don't like the color. I have no reasonable explanation for my distaste. Why, after all, does one like Pepsi but have no interest in Coke? I don't know why I don't like the color orange. To the best of my recollection I was never attacked by an orange dog or a intimidated by an orange bully. I simply don't like the color.
And so it was ironic that today I received my invitation to register for this event called "The Orange Conference" set for April in Atlanta. Merely on the face of it, it doesn't sound like my kind of thing. Orange, for crying out loud! Why orange? My question, exactly. Here is how the organizers try to sell it:
"Orange. It's what happens when you mix yellow and red. It is what happens when you combine the light of the church with the love of the family. You get a different color AND you get a unique strategy. Join thousands of churches as we embrace the obvious¦ that the church and family were meant to work together."The "light" of the church -- presumably yellow -- and the "love" of the family -- apparently red. Ah, I get it. Clever. But count me out. I just don't do orange. I appreciate the discount offer and the merchandise credit, but I will have to find some other -- hopefully better and less aesthetically offensive -- way to flex my yellows and reds.
Some other time, perhaps. At least some other color.
2 comments:
Was the conference date April 1st? Perhaps it is an elaborate prank by someone who knows your loathing for orange? Wish I'd thought of it!
I'm not sure if I like the idea of "Yellow" as describing the Church, although the institution often does seem to be rather lacking in courage ...
(What about congregations which are trying to be more "green" ... mix that with red and you get the "black church"???
When will they hold a "red and yellow, black and white" conference....)
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